......

y is lyf lyk dis for me?? It is being really really unfair to me. I am hurt, mistreated, untrusted, unwanted, rejected, alone and confused. Why does it have to be me?? I don't know what to do already. It's the first time such thing ever happened to me and I'm experiencing it now.....and I know now that it really hurts. I'm sentimenting (yacki!!)....my feelings (juiceko!!)....I just can't figure it out. I don't even know why I'm feeling this way....but that's life. And I really know and accept NOW that I am like that (o so so sad). Thank God for the VERY few people who are still there.....making me surprised they're still talkin to me. My so-called "best [beast]frend" has hurt me, backstabbed me, and I'm not even sure if that person is aware of the thing he/she is doin to me. Another thing....(???)...which Im not really supposed to mention here....I have been realy really hurt.......so unsure and yet soooooooooo painful....okei....maybe not THAt painful....but still pretty painful. It's just that now.....it's easier to breathe, knowing that I shared my feelings out to someone who is a living soul....make that two living souls. At this very moment...I no longer have the feeling that I used to have....I am now...simply...annoyed. And yet sometimes you can't stop the fact that there will be times that you will just wish that both of them will drop dead at that very minute (am I thinking too evilly??.....o well) Lesson learned is wag laging umasa....cauz if it turns out that you are sooooo wrong....you'll just get really hurt which is not really sumthin anyone will like to feel.

Have you ever felt that you are so alone? Have you ever experienced being out-of-place in every conferende you have with your "friend"? Well....that person who had it all is none other than me. I don't feel that I'm liked by anyone cause I don't have anyone. Don't have a person to talk to when you need someone to confide with, no shoulder to lean or cry on, no one to trust dearly....yun lng.....bsta nobody. Thinking why I'm saying all this?? That I'm being over-reacting?? No.....a big NO to that because nobidy knows what I feel. Nobody has every reached this point of breakdown in her life. (Goh...I really feel like crying......NAH!!) Ayun lng....more to come.....